• [8/15/2023]

    “I’m working on allowance. Allowing myself to feel, to change, to want, to need, to desire, to rest, to move, to be.

    A past version of self was so critical, it seemed impossible to just exist. Simply existing seemed lazy and useless.

    I don’t agree with those sentiments anymore. It’s okay to pause, rest, move, think, etc. These are useful because they make us human. And allowing yourself to be human is the most authentic form of self love.”

    Life Question: Why is it so difficult to allow ourselves to be?

    My [Developing] Answer: Years of interactions, experiences, words, thoughts — years of limiting belief, just waiting to be dissolved.

    I’m on a pursuit to dissolve my own. Interestingly enough, I think new ones are forming unbeknownst to my conscience. Healing is not a zero sum game. We don’t knock down walls, and magically stop building new ones. Healing seems to be a continuous journey to uncovering buried

  • [11/21/2024]

    I heard someone discuss a pretty helpful practice, in resolving insecurities. She mentioned focusing on “doing hard things.” When overcoming and achieving difficult things, a few things happen internally.

    1. You learn to draw on your courage despite what’s in front of you.

    2. You realize how capable you are– this is powerful.

    3. You increasingly develop your self-esteem.

    I’m sure there are countless other effects as a result of trying/doing “hard” things, but the ones I mentioned change you. They directly combat insecurity, because you prove to yourself everything in opposition to what your fears tell you, you can’t do. It’s a difficult, but beautiful process.

    I can recall doing this very thing (unbeknownst to me). At the tail end of a relationship, I started to train for a half marathon. I’d set out to do this for YEARS and never truly dedicated myself to the process. However, this time I did. After about a week of training, I became single and my self-esteem wavered. But what I didn’t know, was that I’d already started my journey to mending my heart and shifting perspectives on how I viewed myself. Throughout this 16 week marathon prep, I learned just how dedicated, committed, persevering I can be. I proved to myself, and only myself how worthy I was of the things I wanted, as long as I was willing to do the work. This process ushered in a version of me I’d never been before, a more developed version. The aperture with which I viewed life and myself, widened. I could see more parts of me. I wasn’t tied to certain identities anymore, especially the ones that were ultimately leading to a less secure me.

    I’m sure there are other remedies and methods to overcoming insecurity, but this one is simple.

    DO HARD THINGS & PROVE YOURSELF RIGHT.